“F*CK MARRIAGE” by Tarryn Fisher

Tarryn Fisher has chosen to share with us the story of her divorce using fiction, and thus we have the novel “F*ck marriage”.

Her truths about divorce (wisely mixed in the fictional couple’s story) made me very emotional, and also it forced me to look at divorce with different eyes.

I was glad that even though the title of the book is intense and categoric about marriage, everything ends well: with hope and love. For both of them: the female character from the novel and the writer. 🙂

“Divorce makes you live in a tall house because you put more effort into your grieving than you ever put into your marriage. 

That’s what we do as humans, we grieve harder than we ever tried and we build a magnificent fortress of hurt and self-righteous indignation.

In front of this fortress is a garden where you grow your shortcomings. It’s a magnificent garden because that’s where you put all of your effort now. A garden of well-tended self-abuse. You water the shit out of your garden and it grows and grows.

I grew a variety of things in my garden: bitterness, self-hate, numbness, self-pity, resentment, and defeat. I tended that garden with such detail, trimming and nurturing my personal hell until I couldn’t find my way out. 

And let me tell you, it’s a full-time job to hate yourself that much. Because once you start growing the vine of bitterness, it chokes anything healthy that begins to sprout.”

Kindle, 2019